It’s a special time for Mommies, too.
We have to learn that our babies are quickly becoming something other than our babies.
That can be so hard to do.

I spend a lot of time capturing these little moments in the lives of my own children.
I often find that
they are more precious to me
than the ‘proper’ photo shoots that I set up for them.

I like the photos with the toys.
Messy hair.
Mismatched jammies.
I try to include myself in these photos as much as I can.
I always seem to get the urge to whip out the tripod and remote
on days when I’m still in my jammies, too, with hair just as unkempt.
And I still love the images.

I wanted to capture the little moments that I love so much for another mommy.
Just her and her little person
doing what they do during the day.
Something for her to look back on in a few years, smile, maybe cry,
but ultimately be oh so happy that she can hold something in her hands
that freeze the simplicity of those days
when her baby was still her baby.

So, I put out my first casting call.

This is what happened:

It was nice.

Middle Row:
It was also a tad scary because our youngest was very sick.
Her fever got very high at one point.
Everything was fine in the end, but it made this momma bear worried.
(This is where Papa Bear would say, “What DOESN’T make you worried?)
She slept on a chair in the living room and missed out on all the excitement of ringing in a New Year.
There is always next year.

(In one image, you can see Paeton trying to make her laugh
though you can’t see Aryah)

Bottom Row:
I taught our oldest daughter to finger knit.
She loved it.
She whipped up a cute little scarf in about an hour.
She gave it to her Nana.
I love to loom knit and think it will be easy for her to learn, too.
It’s our next project.

We put up a bird house this summer.
John picked the spot and didn’t realize it would be smack in the middle of my view
for my ‘Views from My Back Porch’ photos I love to take.
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.
At least it is fun watching the birds.

Today I’m posting a few of my Resolutions.  Maybe it will help me stick to them!

 1.) Blog More

This one is pretty easy to explain. 
I want to establish some sort of regular blogging schedule to help me blog more.
Each year I say I want to blog more, but this year I want to find ways to make it easier on me and
to help me keep up with it.

2.) Take More Photos of the Kidlets

Back when Paeton was born, I was starting on my 2nd attempt at a 365.
I also did one for the kids.
I have a photo a day of the first six months of her life.
That’s pretty awesome.
I haven’t decided if I want to do something with more structure, like a 365 or a 52 week project,
or just make a sort of loosely structured project.
Whatever I do, more photos will happen!

3.)  Better Organization for Personal Photos

I’m soooo bad about my personal photos.
I tend to dump them in random folders with names about what I took,
but this makes for a very rough time when I want to do something like…

4.)  Finally Catch Up on my Own Photo Books

One reason I’m so behind is because of my problem in number 3.  It’s hard to go through and collect
images for a yearly book when you can’t find what you are looking for.
Seriously, how hard is it for me to just dump them in folders by month?
I can do that, right? 

5.)  Make a Photo Book of my Past Fave 365s

I have a lot of favorite images from my past 365 attempts.  I’d love to put them into a book and then make another
book JUST for my current project.
The one that I’m actually going to finish.
You can see it here

6.)  Take More Photos Together with my Love

I have some really awesome photos with John.
I want more.
I want enough to fill a book.
I want us to be able to celebrate our 50th anniversary looking through book after book
showcasing our love.

7.)  Live More.  Laugh More.  Love More.

This is something a fellow photographer Sarah says.
She has a lovely outlook on life.
Makes perfect sense, yes?

Some things I forgot to mention and that are not photo related are:

a.)Make a blanket.
I want to knit an afghan or make a quilt or both.

b.) Organize this house
I’d like to paint it, too.
Make it more a home.

c.)  Start Writing Again
I used to write all the time.
I was the girl with a journal in her hand and a story in her heart.
I’d like to find her again.

There are always others, but for now, I’ll leave you with this sweet image of my baby as she was first starting to feel sick.
She needs me to love on her right now.

A small look back at what happened with RLP this year.
I did a lot of boudoir this year, too, but can’t really show all that hotness.

And I want to say thank you, thank you, thank you to all my dear clients. You guys are the reason for all these beautiful photos. You guys are amazing.

Yes, it has been a pretty great year.
I’ve said hello to some new babies,
celebrated  with couples getting married,
and spent time with some fabulous families.

But it has also been a bitter sweet year.
Emilie, the amazing mom in the above photo, lost her fight with a brain tumor this year.
I want to spend 2012 living the legacy she left behind.
“We should all be so in love with each day.”
Don’t think that is a beautiful way to live?
I do.

See you in 2012, my friends!!

I think she is.

You came as such a surprise to us with your early arrival.
It was scary and exciting all at the same time and in the end we had
this tiny, itty bitty baby who stole our hearts.

Life with you has been so interesting.
You are much more wild than
your sisters.
That in itself is pretty funny because
I thought Paeton was
going to be our wild one.
I was SO wrong.

Your will is so strong and
your determination rivals even
your father’s.

There is never any doubt if you are upset.
You are happy to let us know.
And when you get in trouble,
you are quick to try
and pucker up
to smooth it over with a kiss.

You are a wiggly
snuggle bug
who loves to crawl into my lap
and bury your sweet head
into the curve of my neck.
It’s one of the best feelings in the world.

Much to my utter dismay,
you can find a way to scale anything.
A favorite past time for you
seems to be seeing just how
many times you can try to get in the spice cabinet.
Our kitchen has smelled of
curry on more than one
occasion.

Another ‘delightful’ thing you just
ADORE
is finding markers or pen
and scribbling furiously
over every inch of exposed skin.
In fact, you
are currently painted in shades of red
and black that is
s l o w l y
rubbing off from the last
encounter with permanent
marker.

I love you, sweet baby.
Forever and always.

Mommy

That age when she is staring to notice clothes, style, hair.
I think I was roughly 11 before this started to happen to me.
Up until that point I would happily run around with whatever I picked up off the floor and bedhead.
And then one day I woke up and refused to leave the house until my hair was brushed and I had on proper clothes.

It’s all very strange to me that at almost seven she is starting to care.
She likes to help pick out her clothes, has an input on how her hair is going to be for the day.

One of her favorite games is “Stylish,” which is what she is doing here.
She’ll dress up in clothes she thinks are hip ( in this case, a sailor style dress….) and brush her hair, look in the mirror, and announce how stylish she is.

She’s growing up.

It was hard.

The last ten years have been filled with many ups and downs, as life tends to do, but I wasn’t able to share any of it with her. Not having her face to face, of course, though I do feel her presence strongly. Often at the oddest of times.

What I have had in the last decade was love. Family. Friends. An amazing man who, even while he is driving me completely up the wall, makes me tingle when I think of how much I love him. Four children whose beauty brings tears to my eyes on so many occasions. Not just physical beauty, mind you, but the beauty inside of their hearts. Even during the fighting, yelling, and defiance of childhood, they are still oh so beautiful to me.

Losing my mother has made me treasure these moments even more. Knowing that my siblings and I have but a handful of photos of my mother in the last year of her life made me pick up a camera. My photos, as much as they make me so, so happy, they are not for me. They are for my children. Their children. Their children’s children.

I have a huge desire this year to wrap myself up in the real. Those little moments that go by so fast but that you miss the most when you realize that they are gone. I hope that it is showing in my work. I want to share it. I will be sharing more of it. I think that is what photography is all about, right? Those moments?

It is raining here. I’m writing this quickly so I won’t go back and look at it and change things and then save it as a draft only to never publish. Believe me, I’ve done this plenty of times in the last few weeks leading up to the 10th milestone of my mom’s death. The rain (more so the lightning) is giving me the perfect excuse just to write quickly, pour it out, hit publish, and give a promise of more to come. I believe I’ve mentioned in the past how I want more of a connection in my blog but I never really follow through. It is a scary thing to put yourself out there, but the photographers that I’m drawn to, the ones that I want to hire to document my own family, part of their appeal is how real they are. Their blogs are just not filled with pretty pictures, they are filled with wonderful words that describe real life. I love that. I want that.

I have to get off of here. It is really starting to rain, and there are books to be read, children to sing to, and laundry to fold. Since a photo blog needs a photo, here is a fun one from early summer.

I love her hair in need of a comb, the look of concentration, the evidence of lunch being made. I’m 80% sure that she is probably without pants. Pants seem to be very overrated in this house for the girls.

That’s how long it took for this little guy to come home.

Despite the fact that he decided to arrive well ahead of schedule,

he is perfect.

Before I share some images from his session, I have to share my two favorite things about his nursery.

Coolest things ever, right? I really adored his mom’s sense of style.

My favorite part about this one? The accidental reflection up in the picture. I didn’t notice it until I pulled this up on my computer. Complete adoration in her face.

*sigh*
That last one may be my favorite image so far this year.

So in love.

It’s been a long time since I’ve done a personal post,

and since last night I found three folders full of personal images that I’ve

NEVER EVEN TOUCHED,

I thought it was well past time!

Well, I was going to start out with the oldest, but I realized that so many of these summer photos featured him without a shirt. He is very much against online shirtless photos, so here are two that I don’t think I’ve ever shared.

Rocking out with John’s guitar.

And playing at a local playground.

And a few from this summer.

Turtle. Turtle.

That poor turtle. He wanted to keep it as a pet, but forgot to take it back home with him.
I found it roaming the kitchen and so I let it go.

This one cracks me up. He knew the shirt was on inside out and backwards, but he didn’t care.

Our little Kindergarten graduate.

We had a bit of a sad time at the end of the school year when she realized she wouldn’t have the same teacher.
She just started 1st grade this past week and is in love with school all over again.

She looks completely like her dad in this one.

The dress she is wearing is an adult dress, one I’ve kept over the years even though I can’t wear it anymore. I had actually pulled it out to donate when she spotted it and now it is in their dress up trunk.

Days before she lost her top tooth.

Just a wee bit excited about the lost tooth.

I’m a little obsessed with her curls. She’s the only one that has my curls (so far, at least, the verdict is still sort of out on the baby) and I just love them.

Hammy ham ham.

This is her standard pose.

And the baby. Sweet, sweet girl who is a tiny little ball of energy right now, so I’m just happy with anything I get from her!!

This is what she thinks of my camera these days.

And messes are her thing.

So, there you have it.

Our summer in a nutshell.

We kinda rock.